Step 3 is all about letting go….something I’ve been working on for years. It’s about allowing things to come to you, instead of you forcing things to happen. It means trusting whatever higher power you have, to have your back. Being grounded in knowing that no matter how circumstances appear to be, there are forces at work for you, that you can’t see, arranging your life to work out well for you. How does this knowing translate in our behavior? It means doing our best not to force things to happen, letting life flow, instead of structuring and mapping out every little thing. It means not getting angry or frustrated when it seems like nothing good is coming. Is this easy to do? Of course not! Your ego will rear its little head, telling you that the only way to succeed is to force effort, to control yours and other people’s actions. When I first started practicing this art, I was terrified. I remember thinking that if I let go of my fear and control, “what would I have left?” That was a shocking revelation for me. I didn’t even recognize at the time, that I was so addicted to fear and control.
One of the hardest situations in my life to let go of is, trusting that my financial life will work out well for me. I’ve experienced so much change in regards to jobs and how and where to live, in the last 5 years. Change has come more quickly within this time period than ever before in my life, and I find myself here again. Being out of work used to throw me into a total panic, but now I am much more calm about it. Even though I have only enough money to pay for the second half of my rent for this month, and enough food to see me through next week, I am making the decision to trust that all will work out well. I have a bootcamp for a job next week. That day will determine if I get the job I was interviewed for last week. I’ve also applied to be a Lyft driver, which hasn’t been approved yet. So, it’s easy to let stress take control. I try not to let it, but there are signs in my body that tell me that I haven’t perfected letting go yet; the tightness in my neck, and the headaches. But as I write this I tell myself that all is well, and that there are new adventures for me on the horizon. Each job I’ve had in the last 5 years has been better and better. Better financially, better with the kinds of people and management I work with. I’ve changed too. I handle myself in different ways than I used to. I’ve replaced fear with excitement in interviews, which makes me come off as confident and at ease. I went from having jobs where I was micro managed, (something that makes me so nervous and really prone to making lots of mistakes) to jobs where I have a lot of autonomy, where I have the freedom to make mistakes and learn from them.
What do you have a hard time letting go of, and how does it affect you? Let me know in the comments below.